Good Morning Britain

Good Morning Britain

Good Morning Britain

Good Morning Britain

Is this the most ironically titled breakfast show in the history of television?

Every morning I wake at 6am, sit down on the sofa with a cup of tea and some wheat based cereal and switch on the TV. I like to be eased into the new day, like a child starting primary school, deep down I know there are harder things to come but right now let me doing some colouring in and play bumper cars in the playground. Bumper cars was a game at my school where kids would wear their school bags on their front and run into each other in an attempt to knock their opponents out of the circle, like a rucksack sumo. I was never very good at the game as I chose to use a hessian bag for life as a school bag which offered very little protection when being charged into. However, the durability of the bag meant that I was able to use it right the way through to university so I’m sure we’d all agree who the real winner was. Me. It was me.

Nevertheless I flick through the channels and however popular Raymond claims to be I prefer a bit of light hearted pre-sunrise chat so usually tune into ITV for their popular breakfast show Good Morning Britain. However, over the past six months I’ve found the structuring of the show baffling, a particular example being a segment on the underground British slave trade, followed by a cut away to Andy Peters in the back of a van. I also can’t help but feel that some of the subject matter is designed to elicit fear amongst the viewers.

Here is the kind of thing I mean:

“Thanks for joining us, now we all enjoy the occasional piece of shortbread but new studies have shown eating just one biscuit a month could increase your chances of getting testicular cancer. Today we are joined on the sofa by Eric, Eric was diagnosed with testicular cancer 18 months ago, Eric, when did you find out you had the cancer? And do you like shortbread? … sorry Eric we are going to a break now but we’ll back with some stats about genital mutilation and Lemar is here in the studio to perform his new single.”

I understand there are issues in the world but I’m not sure that bombarding the nation at that time in the morning is the best way to raise awareness. Not only that, but those topics are hardly conducive to me enjoying the work of UK soul artist Lemar. Even the most versatile performer would struggle to follow a segment on Islamic radicalisation. I have often in the past made love to a Lemar’s album (the music not the cover art) but now I’m scared that the sound of his gravely tones may take me back to a feature on I.S or worse a mental image of Richard Arnold.

There are positives about the show of course, mainly the versatility of lead presenter Ben Shepard, he is the swiss army knife of broadcasting. One minute he is berating a politician over the Right to Buy scheme and before you can say miniature nail file he is anchoring a midfield in a celebrity football match. Yes we’d like to see him show a bit more chest but I can see the value in Ben wearing a suit especially during the election run in.

Gone are the feel-good stories about cats dialling 999 to save an elderly relative who has fallen down the stairs, I.S and disease now dominate our screens and I for one fail to see what cats can do to help with those things? We can only hope that the good days return and begin to reign supreme like Oliver Jones in a game of year 4 bumper cars (very big for his age, smelt like TCP).

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